Band Boy Immortalized

Many people may have forgotten about Michigan St. sticking their flag in the middle of the field at Notre Dame Stadium following their victory 2 years ago. Apparently Irish WR Golden Tate was not one of these people. I'm not sure which will have the longer legacy, Tate's leap or this dudes face, ha!

Reactions to this Weekend

By: Brandon Phillips

Happy Monday peeps, and as you know I frown upon "Aww it's Monday," guy so don't be that guy! Let’s get started at the Top Gators vs Gator Bait (ie former Tennessee Vols) I think this was the game everyone was looking to, interesting it fell at 2:30 on Saturday but we’ll take it. Vegas said Florida by 29.5, a few of my Gator friends said 88.5 and at the end of the day, thanks to 2 Tebow turnovers, we were left with 23-13 (YUCK)!

Had a chance to listen to the UT postgame show and you would have thought they won the game (I think they made rings). I can’t fully hate on the moral victory, Lord knows I played that card last week following WKU vs S. Florida, I guess the distinction would be WKU has been IA for all of 3 games and UT houses a BCS Championship Trophy, but perhaps I am blinded by Orange hate.
Moral victories aside Kiffin’s justification that his verbal diarrhea all summer had worked in removing pressure from his players is BS, UT’s recent record against Florida and their 7th grade QB lowered expectations so much that if anything you put pressure on your guys. No one expected you to win that game, good sakes you are unranked playing the #1 team in the country, in the Swamp, with Superman at QB, and a 29.5 point underdog, what pressure could you have possibly had? At this point Kiffinis clown shoes to me, but time will tell if he is Bozo or Krusty!

Other quick hitters, USC ran into their Achilles heal and lost yet another PAC 10 road game to a team they should probably beat by 2 scores or more. How great of a coach would Ty Willingham be if he could coach up his own players the way those who follow him do? Just weird. Either way I don’t think it’s coincidence that another former USC assistant, Steve Sarkisian, came in to this Washington program, kept his mouth shut, worked hard, and got his boys to do what Kiffin’s couldn’t.

The BCS probably sent out Thank You cards and $100 Itunes gift cards today to every coach and player at Florida St. and Oregon after knocking the Cougars and Utes out of the BCS picture and saving the Bull Crap Series a lot of headache. A big win for the Ducks ending Utah ending the nation’s longest winning streak, perhaps Legarrette Blount should punch one player from Boise St. in the face every two weeks to keep the momentum.

On the NFL side the Bengals, Raiders, and Bills impressed the hell out of me coming back from terrible, terrible, and did I say terrible losses last week and getting big W’s this week. The Jets talked smack then smacked the Patriots right in the mouth so hard it knocked Rodney Harrison out of his broadcast seat and caused a domino effect as he knocked into Tony Dungy who then knocked into the other 175 ‘analysts’ at NBC. Tonight big MNF game as the Colts look to take a commanding lead in the AFC South and the Dolphins look to avoid the NFL’s version of “The Red Ring of Death,” an 0-2 start. Vegas likes the Colts by 4.

Lastly my Hilltoppers, my poor, poor Hilltoppers. Following WKU’s 28-7 loss to IAA Central Arkansas Coach Elson is catching it from the Topper faithful. Maybe you can defend a trouncing to the Vols, and claim a moral victory against S. Florida (that’s what Kiffin tells me) but Central Arkansas? I don’t think you can spin this one, and if the Tops don’t fix some things, and fix them fast, things are going to get ugly. On a side bar we did celebrate the 1-year anniversary of WKU’s last victory at our house on Sunday, so at least it was a reason to party!

NCAA Football Is Here and I Want to Dance!

By Brandon Phillips

Here at last!  We are just under 9 hours away from the kickoff of College Football, and I feel like a kid in a candy store, with a Sears catalog turned to the toys section on Christmas Eve.  At some point in my life the wonderful anticipation and excitement of holidays that I once felt as a kid was no longer!  No longer were birthdays, Easters, or Christmas Eve's quite the celebration that they once were.  Not to sound all Vince Young after losing his starting job and disappearing into the night, for they were still fun, but the anticipation and excitement was simply not the same.  I was wondering in a maze of darkness searching the globe to find something to bring back that inner child and the days of slap bracelets and freezy pops!  Sure enough it was under my nose the entire time!

You would think at the end of the college and professional football seasons you would be somewhat ready for a break from the gladiators of the grid iron.  Not me!  I eat every second of it up like Joey Chestnut in a Nathan's Hot Dog Outlet Store, and miss it to no end when it's gone.  In some way, however, the down time is not all bad, for as some fru fru poet or writer once said "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," and I am about as "fonded,"as I can be come September.  That period of time from late February to September serves a fountain of youth, renewing a thirst I thought I had lost!

Tonight my thirst will be quenched to the tune of 9 games, 3 of which will be carried by ESPN.  South Carolina vs NC State at 6 on ESPN, North Texas vs Ball St at 6:30 on ESPNU, and the grand finale Boise St. and the Smurf Turf vs The Fighting Nike Swoosh's of Oregon at 9:15 on ESPN.  Honestly at this point the lineup could include Buttcrack St. (Hotel's Favorite) vs Montana Polytechnic Institute A&M Jr. College playing on ESPN Ocho, I don't care bring it!  

Excitement breeds excitement, and it's more contagious than swine flu!  This is why I contest football season is so great for it brings so many people together to celebrate one cause, and harness the energy of every person in the crowd.  Not to mention everyone is undefeated come week 1, and every fan (realistically or not) has a since of optimism about the potential of their team.  And don't forget the best part, we get to b!&$ch about the BCS for 4 months, woo hoo!!

So here's a toast to you fellow football fans, sit back and enjoy what is about to be another great season of college football.

A Kindergarten Lesson

By: Derek "Hotel" Hottell


We have all heard the phrase, "Everything we needed to know we learned in Kindergarten," and in a lot of ways, it is true. One of those simple life lessons is that we should be responsible for our own actions. If I put gum in Suzie's hair, then I get put in timeout, not Timmy.

The NCAA apparently hasn't learned this lesson, as evident by the recent situation with Derrick Rose and Memphis.

What I cannot understand is how Memphis could be assigned blame for Rose having someone else take his SAT, which at this point has not even been proven, if the NCAA Clearinghouse approved Rose and indicated that he was academically eligible to compete.

Aren't the responsible parties for this incident the testing center, the athlete, and the NCAA Clearinghouse? I'm not sure how you could possibly assign any of the blame to Memphis or Calipari. The athlete was approved, and they rightfully assumed he was eligible to play.

Now, if Memphis or Calipari knew of the situation or abetted it, then, yes, they are responsible, but if that is not the case, then they should not be punished for others' mistakes.

We learned that when we were six, but apparently the NCAA did not.

Colts Football: When a Win is not a Win!!!

By: B Phillips

As a long time Colts fan that can remember the days of an empty RCA Dome, a starting QB named Jeff George, and a dropped Hail-Mary in the1995 AFC Champion game, it's hard to find much to be picky about these days.

The Super Bowl Victory over the Bears following the 2006 NFL season was a long time coming, and in many ways an end to a journey that began years ago following a late night truck ride from Baltimore to Indianapolis. The Irony behind the victory on that rainy night in Miami is that most 'true-blue' Colts Fans probably weren't dancing in the streets and celebrating their firm grasp of the elusive Lombardi trophy, but rather, like myself, sat isolated in their homes taking deep, deep sighs of relief (up and until the parade of course), and thinking "Finally!" You see with success comes expectations, and even most Jaguar Fans would have to admit the Colts have been an extremely successful franchise since Peyton Manning's arrival in Indianapolis following the1997 draft.

Since then the Colts have only missed the playoffs twice (once in his rookie year 3-13), and are 63-17 since 2003 reeling off five straight seasons of 12 wins or more, a rarity in today's NFL. But as the Colts continued to put tally's in the 'W' column, and Peyton and the Colts high powered offense were putting points on the scoreboard, Colt's critics (and there were plenty) kept reminding Colt's Fans, "What have you done in the Playoffs," and labeled the team as "soft." Progressing a once lonely NFL franchise in a small market, (who's previous success and history was left behind in Baltimore), to one of the dominant teams in the NFL was no longer an accomplishment. With success comes expectations.

You could almost see it coming like a small snowball, which rolls down a hill, picking up steam, before finally becoming a thundering avalanche tearing through a small village. When will the Colts make the playoffs? When will the Colts win a playoff game? When will the Colts beat the Patriots and make it to a Super Bowl? Not to mention the constant harassment from fans of opposing teams in our division (Ten and Jax most notably) constantly reminding Colts fans how 'Overrated,' we were. Can you imagine the legacy left on the table if all of the turn around and all of the hype during Peyton's tenure came to an end without a Super Bowl win? Not just an appearance (which in 1995 would have been unimaginable and welcome) but a win?

Thankfully much like the Cuban Missile Crisis before it, all of this was avoided at the conclusion of Super XLI in Miami when the scoreboard read, Colts 29 Bears 17. Our time had come, if only for one night our critics would be silenced, and our Colts were the World Champions. No doubt an exciting time for a Colts fan, but instead of dancing in the streets and pointing fingers towards Nashville and Jacksonville, I sat in my rocking chair like a man 40 years my elder, looked at my wife and said, finally!

Stay Dirty

Bob Knight is Pokemon

By: Derek "Hotel" Hottell

One of the greatest benefits of living on the west coast is that College Gameday is playing as soon as you wake up in the morning. I used to feel like a little kid waking up for Saturday morning cartoons jumping out of bed and bolting to the TV to check out Bugs Bunny and the gang.

But, this joy has recently become less and less appealing because of the addition of Coach Bob Knight to the Gameday lineup. It feels like when they started to play cartoons like Power Rangers and Pokemon instead of the good stuff.

Now, I would never tell him this to his face because if I did he would kill me and eat my children. (If you aren’t sure about his general attitude toward humanity, here is a clip of him doing his golf show: Click Here) But, while he may be a great, legendary coach, he is an awful sports commentator and an even worse color analyst.

A perfect example of this would be him droning endlessly about the value of the shot fake during the Gonzaga vs. Memphis game on Saturday. We aren’t talking about three or four times, either, but more like 20 minutes of the game. Gonzaga is trying to make a furious comeback with their second string in the game, Jay Bilas is doing an admiral job of drumming up excitement and actually giving interesting insight, and Knight keeps talking about the shot fake. 

Someone needs to pull him aside and tell him it isn’t a film session with his team, but instead it is television show, which should have some entertainment value!

But, I’m not sure if that is worse than his detailed analysis while picking games where he speaks like a caveman and not the Geico kind.

“Ugh, me Bob Knight, Kansas,” he grunts. Great pick Coach! Thank God you are there to give us your extensive knowledge of the game.

Not only is he personally awful, but because he is such a bully, he makes everyone else worse. I wish that Digger Phelps, Jay Bilas, and the rest of the gang would just tell him to shut up and stop pandering to him. 

I hope he takes the Georgia job just so I don’t have to listen to him anymore. It is amazing that someone who is so entertaining as a coach can be so awful as a commentator. I liked him better when he was punching students, chocking his players, and throwing chairs, but at least we still can rely on Pat Knight to carry on the family tradition. After all, like father, like son. So, ESPN I implore you. Please give me back the adult version of Saturday morning cartoons!

Santonio Holmes Sold Drugs...... No Way!

By: B. Phillips

From the world of Duh, and who cares Santonio Holmes announced to everyone at the Super Bowl this week that he sold drugs for 1 year as a kid, and felt it was time to share his secret in the hopes of 'changing kids lives.' AWESOME, so what's next, are you going to tell us you've smoked weed before, oh wait you were already arrested for that this year. I wonder how many kids lives you are changing with that charge? I mean seriously why do so many athletes feel that they have to 'share,' with us in the interest of doing us a favor or teaching us a lesson? I'm as interested in Holmes' drug history as I am a book by Jerome Bettis on how to fake an injury and keep your job, not at all. Now if everyone will excuse me I'm going to read this article to my son in the hopes he one day will run for office!

Stay Dirty,

BP

The 10 Questions I would ask AC Slater!

By: Brandon Phillips!

These are the 10 Question I would like to ask Mario Lopez, formerly AC Slater on Saved by the Bell!

1) Do you think Slater called Jessi Mama because of the lack of a mother figure in his life, and as a result he viewed his close relationship with a female (Jessi) similar to that of a mother/son relationship? And if so isn't that kind of like incest, and given you got to hook up with Elizabeth Berkley did you even care?

2) How many tank-tops, and spandex under shirts did Slater own exactly, and do you still wear stone washed jeans with black dress shoes?

3) Where there ever any topics that Saved by the Bell talked about dealing with but decided to hold off because of their time slot (Saturday Morning TV)? ie Perhpas a 3-way between Zach, Screech and Kelly following a night of heavy drinking? Or one of the main characters developing a drug dependancy other then sleeping spills, such as Zach on Blow, Slater on HGH, or Lisa on weed?

4) Were you surprised that of all people Screech was the first one to do release a sex tape?

5) Were there any other high schools in California at that time, or were Bayside and Valley just locked in every state final, of every sport?

6) Did the SBTB Gang ever arrive at the Max only to find someone else setting at their table in the back, proceed to beat the living shit out of them then proclaim the max to be "Our House!"

7) Did you ever want to do Mrs. Morris (she was hot)

8 ) Do you find that people recognize you less with out your perm, and could you take Mr. Kotter in a fight to the death to see who has the best Perm in TV?

9) Did Zach ever "Cell Whip" anyone with his brick sized cell phone, and do you have any idea what service he used? Did they have the network?

10) Did you ever go watch Showgirls, and during the sex scene in the pool stand up and scream "Yea Mama, I hit that!

Until Next Time

Stay Dirty!

Coaches Poll + BCS = BS!

By Brandon Phillips

I feel in the interest of establishing credibility I must first admit that, yes, I recently stated on PST Radio as well as The Sports Guys that I was growing tired of listening to the BCS criticism and playoff solutions. You would think that puts me in the minority when it comes to most college football fans’ view of the BCS, but actually I am on the same Anti-BCS bus, riding to the same stadium, for the same game. You see, “I am Brandon Phillips, and I am a Playoffaholic!” I despise the BCS as much as the next person, however it has become quite obvious that our cries for a playoff are falling on deaf ears, and the reality of change is nowhere in sight. As a result we, as fans, have been relegated to nothing more than puppies chasing our tails, having the same arguments day in and day out. Think about it for a second, if you had a nickel for every time you heard a “who should be in the BCS title game, who shouldn’t be in the BCS title game,” argument that ended with, “That’s why we need a playoff,” you could be the official sponsor of the BCS is Crap Bowl, time and location TBA. The sad part is the small concentration of people who control the BCS, and feed us this “BCS is good for College Football,” crap, have made us, as fans, so irrational that we spend most of our time arguing with each other over something we all agree upon to begin with (we need a playoff). 

The BCS Boobs tell us that all of our arguments about “Who’s number one?” go to show how much interest in college football the BCS generates. Excuse me, I think my BS alarm is going off, allow me to hit the snooze button! So am I to believe there was less interest in college football prior to the BCS? We must stop wasting our time arguing with each other about who should or shouldn’t be in the BCS title game, and redirect this frustration towards the BCS Boobs and force their hand for a PLAYOFF! Leave behind the old days of BCS rhetoric, challenge all playoff naysayers the way you challenge the fan who says USC would beat Florida, or Texas should be in over Oklahoma. I feel it is reasonable to assume if you made a list of the top three groups who should have the most say in the postseason format of college football, you it would go (in some order) Players, Coaches, and Fans. However, as I listen to each of these groups scream for a change, all I hear is college presidents feel the system is “fine.” Interesting that the one group not included in the aforementioned list of “who should matter,” is the one pulling the strings. Ladies. And gentlemen, welcome to college football purgatory.

Now let me reel my ADHD back get to the basis for this article. One of my criticisms of the BCS (among many) has been the Coaches Poll which comprises 1/3 of the BCS formula, or 33.33333333333333333333333333% for those of you who play the percentages. The Coaches Poll in theory sounds like a reasonable idea. Create a panel of voters comprised of respected coaches, include representation from each Bowl Subdivision conference (AKA Division IA for normal people), and let them weigh in on who are the most deserving teams to play for a national championship. Each week these individuals will provide a ranking of Bowl Subdivision teams in an order they feel most appropriate, taking into consideration wins, losses, strength of schedule, blah, blah. I think most of us are okay, up to this point with the theory of a College Football Coaches Poll: now for the problem. For the Coaches Poll to have any credibility, I contend it must center on the premise that the 61-member panel is comprised of high character people who will vote each week in an ethical and unbiased manner. However, I am of the opinion that the next poll, of any kind, which is conducted ethically and unbiased will be the first of its kind. The voting process in and of itself is designed to encourage bias, which is why you vote and support one team or candidate and oppose another. It is human instinct to want to protect your own agenda. Additionally I contest it is extremely hypocritical to expect me, the fan, to take any poll seriously that hands out ballots to:

George O’ Leary: Subject of NCAA investigation at GA Tech regarding ineligible players, and in 2001 was relieved of his temporary duties as Notre Dame Head Coach following the discovery of “inaccuracies” on his resume.

Hal Mumme: UK fans might remember this guy for his high-octane offense as well as the probation, loss of scholarships, and post-season ban that would prevent the Wildcats from taking part in Bowl Play for three seasons.

Mike Price: Probably most remembered for his brief stint as the head coach of the Alabama Crimson Tide, however he was relieved of his duties before even coaching a game after it was alleged by Sports Illustrated that Price was seen at a strip club then later checking into a room with one of the dancers. (I think it is important to not that I’m not criticizing the act as much as I am the judgment.)

Steve Kragthorpe: Need I say more Louisville fans?

And what happens to the votes for coaches given the pink slip moving forward? Tommy Bowden, Sylvester Croom, Philip Fulmer, Tommy Tubberville, Tyrone Willingham? Of course does the question of who is voting really matter if the coaches do not take the time to vote anyway? 

It seems the consensus amongst college football fans is that the coaches do not pay attention to their commitment of doing the poll, and in fact, do not even fill it out themselves, but rather have various staff members make the picks on their behalf. This what brought to light when prior to a 2007 matchup with the Texas Longhorns Ohio St. coach Jim Tressel claimed to vote the Longhorns number one, and his Buckeyes number two. However it was later discovered he actually voted Ohio St. number one and Texas number two. Many felt Tressel didn’t want to give the Longhorns any added billboard material which is why he was less than honest about his ballot. Tressel defended his original comments on the vote by laying the blame on Ohio. St. Director of Player Development Stan Jefferson, who allegedly “changed the pick” when calling it in. For as you know, Directors of Player Development change their head coaches’ votes without their knowledge pretty regularly. Tressel made his original comments with the comfort of knowing the ballots were not made public, however USA Today let it be known if public comment is made by a coach, and is inaccurate, it is their place to set the record straight. Treessel isn’t the only one doing it, he is just the one who got caught. Now each season the final coaches poll is made public (which I love), but what is the logic in not having these votes public all year? How can you justify the last week of the regular season, and not the rest? Is it simply a matter of sacrificing accountability in the poll in exchange to limit bulletin board material for opposing teams?

The latest incident bringing the Coaches Poll into question revolves around Texas Longhorn head coach Mack Brown. Brown announced last week that he would have voted Texas No. 1 in the last coaches poll, going against an agreement with the BCS, but stated, "I read something that said your vote didn't count if you voted for number one because number one already was taken. I didn't want to hurt our team by voting us number one and it not counting, so I guess I misunderstood.” For starters Brown reiterates a clause in the Coaches Poll which dictates coaches have to vote the winner of the BCS Title game number one in their final vote of the season, regardless if they feel that team is deserving or not. Additionally Mack Brown openly acknowledges he’s not even really clear on what the rules of voting are to begin with. Now do these sound like the traits of a system worth determining a national champion in college football to you?

I think it’s important to note that the coaches aren’t entirely to blame. How can you reasonably assume a man who works 80 hours a week preparing his football team could keep up with 30 or 40 other teams across the nation? Additionally, if my paycheck and job security were in some way tied to the outcome of that poll, you can darn well believe I’ll be casting the most self-serving ballot you’ve ever seen. While the Coaches Poll is by all accounts a joke, it is simply part of the bigger problem, the BCS. And yes I know I’m a hypocrite but “That’s why we need a playoff.” Here’s your friggin nickel!




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