Dribble Drive Motion: Great Offense or Clever Recruiting Tool?

Calipari is installing his dribble drive offense at the University of Kentucky in case you haven't heard. I'm not sure what is more omnipresent right now, the balloon boy, rumors of possible replacements for Kragthorpe, or talk of the new UK offense.

What I find truly interesting is the discussion of this offense as if it were a revolutionary iteration of basketball philisophy. Is it effective? Yes. Is it a wonderful recruiting tool? Definitely. Is it brain surgery? Definitely not.

At its core, it is basically a motion offense that replaces screens with dribble drive penetration. It uses the same principle of filling a spot on the floor and replacing the vacated position, but it uses dribble penetration in lieu of screens or backdoor passes.

As opposed, to the Princeton offense, which allows smaller, shorter teams the ability to be competitive through good shooting, ball control, and decision-making, the dribble drive offense requires good athletes, great shooters, and especially one great ballhandler (see Derrick Rose, Tyreke Evans, and John Wall).

This is where the offense truly excels because it is really organized streetball. It provides incredible freedom and encourages players to show their individual ability by forcing the ball to the basket. Because of this, five star recruits who are trying to make the jump to the pros want to play in this system.

Doing so allows them to demonstrate their skills to the scouts and hone the skills, which will eventually pay the bills. Guards and wing players love it because it puts the ball in their hands driving to the basket or shooting face-up jumpers.

However, if this offense is great for recruiting guards and wing players, it does not afford nearly the same opportunities to the big men who essentially are there for weakside rebounding and to finish alley oops.

Power forwards do just fine, but if you are a center who wants to show that you can play with your back to the basket, you are not going to get many opportunities to do this because you are standing on the block opposite the ball.

But, hey, college basketball is a guards' game, and as long as Calipari keeps getting players like Evans, Rose, and Wall, he would be crazy to not employ an offense that puts the ball in their hands. Or, does he get players like this precisely because his offense puts the ball in their hands?

Its truly a case of the chicken or the egg.

Band Boy Immortalized

Many people may have forgotten about Michigan St. sticking their flag in the middle of the field at Notre Dame Stadium following their victory 2 years ago. Apparently Irish WR Golden Tate was not one of these people. I'm not sure which will have the longer legacy, Tate's leap or this dudes face, ha!

Video of the Day

A good friend of mine, we will call him "Robbie," sent me this video. Over time it is inevitable that things will and do change. We used to have console televisions now we have flat panels, we used to have windows on the house now we have windows on our computer. As we grow older we learn to accept these truths. Some change is for the better and some is not depending on who you ask. Now with that said check out this video of how they used to kiss back in the day and let me know better, or worse nowadays?

Reactions to this Weekend

By: Brandon Phillips

Happy Monday peeps, and as you know I frown upon "Aww it's Monday," guy so don't be that guy! Let’s get started at the Top Gators vs Gator Bait (ie former Tennessee Vols) I think this was the game everyone was looking to, interesting it fell at 2:30 on Saturday but we’ll take it. Vegas said Florida by 29.5, a few of my Gator friends said 88.5 and at the end of the day, thanks to 2 Tebow turnovers, we were left with 23-13 (YUCK)!

Had a chance to listen to the UT postgame show and you would have thought they won the game (I think they made rings). I can’t fully hate on the moral victory, Lord knows I played that card last week following WKU vs S. Florida, I guess the distinction would be WKU has been IA for all of 3 games and UT houses a BCS Championship Trophy, but perhaps I am blinded by Orange hate.
Moral victories aside Kiffin’s justification that his verbal diarrhea all summer had worked in removing pressure from his players is BS, UT’s recent record against Florida and their 7th grade QB lowered expectations so much that if anything you put pressure on your guys. No one expected you to win that game, good sakes you are unranked playing the #1 team in the country, in the Swamp, with Superman at QB, and a 29.5 point underdog, what pressure could you have possibly had? At this point Kiffinis clown shoes to me, but time will tell if he is Bozo or Krusty!

Other quick hitters, USC ran into their Achilles heal and lost yet another PAC 10 road game to a team they should probably beat by 2 scores or more. How great of a coach would Ty Willingham be if he could coach up his own players the way those who follow him do? Just weird. Either way I don’t think it’s coincidence that another former USC assistant, Steve Sarkisian, came in to this Washington program, kept his mouth shut, worked hard, and got his boys to do what Kiffin’s couldn’t.

The BCS probably sent out Thank You cards and $100 Itunes gift cards today to every coach and player at Florida St. and Oregon after knocking the Cougars and Utes out of the BCS picture and saving the Bull Crap Series a lot of headache. A big win for the Ducks ending Utah ending the nation’s longest winning streak, perhaps Legarrette Blount should punch one player from Boise St. in the face every two weeks to keep the momentum.

On the NFL side the Bengals, Raiders, and Bills impressed the hell out of me coming back from terrible, terrible, and did I say terrible losses last week and getting big W’s this week. The Jets talked smack then smacked the Patriots right in the mouth so hard it knocked Rodney Harrison out of his broadcast seat and caused a domino effect as he knocked into Tony Dungy who then knocked into the other 175 ‘analysts’ at NBC. Tonight big MNF game as the Colts look to take a commanding lead in the AFC South and the Dolphins look to avoid the NFL’s version of “The Red Ring of Death,” an 0-2 start. Vegas likes the Colts by 4.

Lastly my Hilltoppers, my poor, poor Hilltoppers. Following WKU’s 28-7 loss to IAA Central Arkansas Coach Elson is catching it from the Topper faithful. Maybe you can defend a trouncing to the Vols, and claim a moral victory against S. Florida (that’s what Kiffin tells me) but Central Arkansas? I don’t think you can spin this one, and if the Tops don’t fix some things, and fix them fast, things are going to get ugly. On a side bar we did celebrate the 1-year anniversary of WKU’s last victory at our house on Sunday, so at least it was a reason to party!

Everyone Murders, duh

Lovin Terelle Pryor's response to Vick eye black. "Not everybody’s the perfect person in the world. I mean everyone kills people, murders people, steals from you, steals from me, whatever."

Like umm

Thanks to Colts Crusader for turning me on to this video. I feel terrible for this kid but it's like a car wreck, you can't help but watch!

The Presents Are Opened

By: Derek Hottell

We woke up on Christmas, ran downstairs, and opened all of our gifts. The college football season is under way, and it is time to figure out what we have been given in the forms of WKU, UK, and UL this year for our proverbial Christmas. Are they our Red Rider BB Gun, something we treasure forever? Or, are they the pink bunny suit from our aunt we never see?

WKU - It is hard to say what we have in WKU this year. The Hilltoppers are eligible for a bowl this year as they complete their transition to Division 1-A (I still like the old terminology.). What is difficult to know from their game against Tennessee is how successful this season can be because with teams from the Sun Belt Conference success isn't measured by games against the SEC.

For sure, they are young. For sure, the offense must be better, especially the passing game and play calling. For sure, WKU must improve their depth and front lines. They are no longer a powerhouse in Division 1-AA; they cannot line up and run teams over.

However, the defense played well for the first quarter until they began to wear down, and the special teams performed better than expected. You would usually expect to see the vast discrepancy in speed and talent in special teams where big plays by the superior team are the norm, but there wasn't any of that during the game indicating that there is at least raw talent at the skill positions.

The final verdict is ...: WKU is not as far away from completing their transition to Division 1-A as the Tennessee score would have you believe. If they improve their depth, beef up their front lines, and become more creative in their play calling, they will turn the corner. Based upon the first game, I would predict a final record of 6-6. They will have a chance to have a record of 8-4, but will lose some close games at the end as their young players still become more seasoned.

UK - The Wildcats were by far the most exciting gift we opened from the local universities this weekend. They showed more explosiveness on offense than they did all of last season, especially in the passing game, and the defense still looks stout. Granted this was all against a Miami (OH) team that will be lucky to win one game in the Mid-American Conference. But, this was opening weekend, and playing Miami (OH) on the road is a tougher test than most major teams experience (see the University of Louisville vs. Indiana State).

The final verdict is ...: The SEC East is still difficult, but it is not the beast that it normally is. Georgia is still good, but not great; South Carolina still has difficulty moving the ball on offense; and Tennessee has talent, but it is young talent. The out of conference schedule is extremely manageable, and the Wildcats will be favored in every one of the games. I predict that UK and Coach Rich Brooks will finally make the hurdle and achieve a .500 record in the SEC, and they will end the season with an 8-4 record and return to their fourth straight bowl game. If a few bounces go their way, it is not inconceivable that they could have a final record of 9-3 and make some noise.

UL - Hmmmmmm. What to make of the University of Louisville? Let's start with the positives. Special teams, while still not great, looked much better than last season. Trent Guy at times looked like the guy that showed flashes of brilliance while returning punts and kick-offs on the Cardinals way to the Orange Bowl three years ago. The kicking game with Shoeless Joe (Ryan Payne) wasn't nearly as woeful, and while the punt average wasn't very high, this was because of the number of pin-backs that Goettsche had.

The defense played looser, faster, and with more abandon than it has in two years. Anderson looked like he will be more formidable than he was last year in route to being named Big East Rookie of the Year. Powell looked like he may start to show the promise he did as a freshman. The receiving corp is fast and deep. Graham will be the type of tightend that Louisville fans are accustomed to having with Ibn Green, Gary Barnidge, and the like.

Now, for the bad. Indiana State is not good. They make Miami (OH) look like the Pittsburgh Steelers. This is a team that lost to an NAIA school the week before playing Louisville. Justin Burke at times looked talented, especially when moving outside of the pocket, but he was shaky at best when throwing the ball downfield, and he must be able to stretch the field, especially in play action, to free up space for Anderson and Powell. The recievers dropped and tipped too many balls. The third down conversion rate was deplorable on both sides of the ball (too few for Louisville, too many for Indiana State).

What is most disconcerting about the play on the field is the play of the offensive and defensive lines. Louisville could not and did not line up and run over the Sycamores, and likewise, they did not force the type of pressure on the quarterback on the defensive side of the ball that you would expect. This has to improve, if they have any hope of being competitive.

The final verdict is...: The play calling wasn't as bad as the score would have you believe. But, Justin Burke, if he remains the starting quarterback, must hit the open receivers downfield that were available. At least 21 points were lost because receivers that were wide open were overthrown. The penalties are more concerning because it is evidence of either a lack of discipline or of being over matched, which if the Cardinals are over matched by the Sycamores, they are in trouble. The Big East isn't great, but there is enough talent that UL will struggle, but they will win one game that they shouldn't and will have a final record of 6-6, but will not go to a bowl game.

So, this is the season that I foresee for us in Kentucky after we experience College Football Christmas, and I plan to enjoy all of the gifts, even the pink bunny suit.

Never Turn The Game Off Early

All of my excitement from yesterdays official kickoff of College Football had me really worn down by the end of the day.  So as the Smurf Turfs finished off the wingless Ducks of Oregon I thought surely it's safe to go to bed, the excitement is bedhind us for the day.  In the words of Lee Corso, "No so fast my friend!"

NCAA Football Is Here and I Want to Dance!

By Brandon Phillips

Here at last!  We are just under 9 hours away from the kickoff of College Football, and I feel like a kid in a candy store, with a Sears catalog turned to the toys section on Christmas Eve.  At some point in my life the wonderful anticipation and excitement of holidays that I once felt as a kid was no longer!  No longer were birthdays, Easters, or Christmas Eve's quite the celebration that they once were.  Not to sound all Vince Young after losing his starting job and disappearing into the night, for they were still fun, but the anticipation and excitement was simply not the same.  I was wondering in a maze of darkness searching the globe to find something to bring back that inner child and the days of slap bracelets and freezy pops!  Sure enough it was under my nose the entire time!

You would think at the end of the college and professional football seasons you would be somewhat ready for a break from the gladiators of the grid iron.  Not me!  I eat every second of it up like Joey Chestnut in a Nathan's Hot Dog Outlet Store, and miss it to no end when it's gone.  In some way, however, the down time is not all bad, for as some fru fru poet or writer once said "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," and I am about as "fonded,"as I can be come September.  That period of time from late February to September serves a fountain of youth, renewing a thirst I thought I had lost!

Tonight my thirst will be quenched to the tune of 9 games, 3 of which will be carried by ESPN.  South Carolina vs NC State at 6 on ESPN, North Texas vs Ball St at 6:30 on ESPNU, and the grand finale Boise St. and the Smurf Turf vs The Fighting Nike Swoosh's of Oregon at 9:15 on ESPN.  Honestly at this point the lineup could include Buttcrack St. (Hotel's Favorite) vs Montana Polytechnic Institute A&M Jr. College playing on ESPN Ocho, I don't care bring it!  

Excitement breeds excitement, and it's more contagious than swine flu!  This is why I contest football season is so great for it brings so many people together to celebrate one cause, and harness the energy of every person in the crowd.  Not to mention everyone is undefeated come week 1, and every fan (realistically or not) has a since of optimism about the potential of their team.  And don't forget the best part, we get to b!&$ch about the BCS for 4 months, woo hoo!!

So here's a toast to you fellow football fans, sit back and enjoy what is about to be another great season of college football.

Brett Favre

By: Brandon Phillips

I almost feel like I am feeding my own frustrations by even acknowledging Brett Favre but below is some commentary from a recent show to pictures, hope you enjoy.

As the Favre Turns

By: Derek Hottell

Is Brett Favre finally out of the limelight? Will the Hattiesburg, Mississippi Travel & Tourism Bureau have to find alternate means to attract people to their town?

The short answer is no. Not at least for the next five years. Rest assured that although Favre will not be a Viking this season, does not mean that he will not be a Jaguar or a Redskin or a Raider in the future.

In fact, I fully expect that for the next several years we will hear rumors regarding Favre returning to some team, and much like a politician who is asked about raising taxes, he will not give an unequivocal response. He will most definitely leave wiggle room, which will leave enough room for it to still be a story.

Don't let there be a team in playoff contention who loses their marquee quarterback during the season. At this point, you know Favre will be discussed, and I would expect him to come back for this. It is the perfect scenario for him.

Consider if the Cowboys are 7-2-0 and leading the NFC East, and Tony Romo became injured. Do you honestly think that Favre would not enter the conversation?

So, until Favre is completely incapable of playing football, he will continually be in the conversation for some team who needs help at the quarterback position. Who knows? You might see a 50 year-old quarterback.

Golf as Sports Entertainment

By: Derek Hottell

I am not going to argue that golf is the most entertaining sport on television to watch, but at times, it can have some intriguing story lines (Mickelson and Duval comebacks), interesting people (John Daly and Boo Weekley), and some human drama.

At its best, it can be completely compelling and engaging (see last year's Ryder Cup or Kenny Perry's collapse at the Master's), but this past weekend, we witnessed the US Open where it was more of a survival test than a test of skills.

My problem is not with the level of play demonstrated by the professionals, but rather with the layout of the course. Bethpage Black is an extremely difficult course on its own accord, but the USGA made it nearly impossible because of the length of the rough and the pin placements.

To this, you may respond, "So what? These are professionals."

But, that is the basic problem. It is tantamount to saying that since baseball players are professionals, we should move the fence back to 500 feet. There will still be some homeruns in this setup, but not very many. Is that what you want to watch?

This is what the US Open does. Rather than allow the players to attempt to make and shape shots, it forces them to simply minimize mistakes and hope for the best.

And maybe that is the way golf is supposed to be played, but I like to watch them grip it and rip it. I want to see Phil Mickelson be able to hit the ball under a tree limb over a sandtrap through the rough and next to the pin. It gives me hope the next time I find myself in the woods, and it is certainly better sports entertainment.

NBA Officiating (I just don't get it)

By: B Phillips

In one of my all time favorite movies Varsity Blues, back up QB turned QB 1 (FNL Reference) Jonathon Moxon proclaimed “In America we have laws.  Laws against killing, laws against stealing.  It’s accepted that, as a member of society, you will live by these laws.”  It is true, America is a society filled with laws and rules, and all my life I have tried to keep pace with each.  When I was in school I followed school rules (don’t speak out of turn, punch other kids, or swear).  Once I became an adult (yes I consider myself somewhat of an adult) I followed work and societies rules (see John Moxon).  While I am a fan of some rules, and some I am not, some I follow, and some I don’t, the one thing I can appreciate about societies rules, generally speaking, is there is very little ‘grey area.’   We understand the rules and the consequences, whether or not we follow them is up to us.

The sports world also has a set of rules, unique to each sport.  In fact these rules sometimes supersede those of real life.  For instance, if you hit someone with a hockey stick in the parking lot of Culver’s you could anticipate an all expenses paid trip to the Warren County Jail and an orange jumpsuit for your troubles.  Do it on the ice within the boards of the hockey rink, worst case you are put in time out (the penalty box).  Kind of funny how that works.  Rules are important in sports for they help maintain the integrity of the game.  To the credit of most professional and collegiate leagues, they have even changed rules as the game has evolved.  While most would agree these rules are pretty easy to understand, the practical application of them presents a bit of a challenge, particularly in the NBA Playoffs.

Until recently I was of the opinion the NBA on the whole was in decline.  The post-Jordan area had left a lot to be desired in terms of star power, the ‘Dream Team’ had become a nightmare, and many American’s felt a strong disconnect with the modern player leading to a steady decline in TV ratings.  Fast forward to today, Kobe vs Lebron has become such a passionate debate it’s border line Holy War, or NBA Jihad as Hotel would say, the ‘Redeem Team’ brought back the Gold, and an 8:30est Game 3 tip between the Rockets and the Lakers was ESPN’s most viewed program of 2009!  You start to get the feeling the NBA is back.

As a result, I really hate to be overly critical of the 2009 NBA Playoffs, I mean good Lord a first round series between Chicago and Boston gave us more excitement than all 4 San Antonio Spurs Championships combined.  However if I were to attempt to isolate an area of improvement for the league to focus on (“Ring, Ring. Yes David Stern I do have a minute,”) it would have to be the over officiating of the playoff games (and Jeff Van Gundy in the booth, he sucks).  Many great games filled with unforgettable highlights and excitement have left fans with a bitter taste in their mouth thanks to everyone’s favorite third team on the court, the officials.  Now let’s not kid ourselves, if our team loses we'll will find a hundred reasons to justify and excuse it (Paul Gasol did goal-tend CLee ha), however the reality is most NBA fans, this year, would probably be justified in their complaints. 

Again at issue is not the NBA rules but rather the application of them.   We all have a basic understanding of the rules, traveling, fouls, out of bounds, etc.  It’s how these rules are applied that becomes so confusing.  There are general rules for everyone, then certain players get their own special rules (Kobe, Lebron, Wade, etc).  Some people get two steps going to the rack, some get 3. Sometimes a foul is a foul but not if it happens in the last 10 seconds of the 4^th qtr.  Sometimes that guy will get that call, while that rookie is not going to get that call ever.  Sometimes it’s not a flagrant foul in the game, but it is when the league looks at the tape, and sometimes it is in the game, but not when the league looks at the tape.  What the hell!!!  How on earth could you ever expect the average NBA fan to be able to A)  keep up with the inconsistencies and   B) understand any of this nonsense? I guess the one thing you can say about NBA officiating, is it’s consistently inconsistent

I have some advice for the NBA officials; grow a set and call the games straight.  If it’s a foul, call it (regardless of the name on the jersey).  If it’s a travel call it, 2 steps or 3, you decide I don't care, just be consistent.  If it was a foul in the 1^st quarter it’s a foul in the 4^th quarter, it’s not that hard.   We’re not talking rocket science (it’s my understanding rocket science is the most complicated thing ever in the whole wide world) just basic hoops 101.   Follow this advice and we will all be better for it.  I would love to fly out and demonstrate these fundamental basketball principals but as my boy Mox said, “Jonathon Moxon is only one man!”

A Kindergarten Lesson

By: Derek "Hotel" Hottell


We have all heard the phrase, "Everything we needed to know we learned in Kindergarten," and in a lot of ways, it is true. One of those simple life lessons is that we should be responsible for our own actions. If I put gum in Suzie's hair, then I get put in timeout, not Timmy.

The NCAA apparently hasn't learned this lesson, as evident by the recent situation with Derrick Rose and Memphis.

What I cannot understand is how Memphis could be assigned blame for Rose having someone else take his SAT, which at this point has not even been proven, if the NCAA Clearinghouse approved Rose and indicated that he was academically eligible to compete.

Aren't the responsible parties for this incident the testing center, the athlete, and the NCAA Clearinghouse? I'm not sure how you could possibly assign any of the blame to Memphis or Calipari. The athlete was approved, and they rightfully assumed he was eligible to play.

Now, if Memphis or Calipari knew of the situation or abetted it, then, yes, they are responsible, but if that is not the case, then they should not be punished for others' mistakes.

We learned that when we were six, but apparently the NCAA did not.

Colts Football: When a Win is not a Win!!!

By: B Phillips

As a long time Colts fan that can remember the days of an empty RCA Dome, a starting QB named Jeff George, and a dropped Hail-Mary in the1995 AFC Champion game, it's hard to find much to be picky about these days.

The Super Bowl Victory over the Bears following the 2006 NFL season was a long time coming, and in many ways an end to a journey that began years ago following a late night truck ride from Baltimore to Indianapolis. The Irony behind the victory on that rainy night in Miami is that most 'true-blue' Colts Fans probably weren't dancing in the streets and celebrating their firm grasp of the elusive Lombardi trophy, but rather, like myself, sat isolated in their homes taking deep, deep sighs of relief (up and until the parade of course), and thinking "Finally!" You see with success comes expectations, and even most Jaguar Fans would have to admit the Colts have been an extremely successful franchise since Peyton Manning's arrival in Indianapolis following the1997 draft.

Since then the Colts have only missed the playoffs twice (once in his rookie year 3-13), and are 63-17 since 2003 reeling off five straight seasons of 12 wins or more, a rarity in today's NFL. But as the Colts continued to put tally's in the 'W' column, and Peyton and the Colts high powered offense were putting points on the scoreboard, Colt's critics (and there were plenty) kept reminding Colt's Fans, "What have you done in the Playoffs," and labeled the team as "soft." Progressing a once lonely NFL franchise in a small market, (who's previous success and history was left behind in Baltimore), to one of the dominant teams in the NFL was no longer an accomplishment. With success comes expectations.

You could almost see it coming like a small snowball, which rolls down a hill, picking up steam, before finally becoming a thundering avalanche tearing through a small village. When will the Colts make the playoffs? When will the Colts win a playoff game? When will the Colts beat the Patriots and make it to a Super Bowl? Not to mention the constant harassment from fans of opposing teams in our division (Ten and Jax most notably) constantly reminding Colts fans how 'Overrated,' we were. Can you imagine the legacy left on the table if all of the turn around and all of the hype during Peyton's tenure came to an end without a Super Bowl win? Not just an appearance (which in 1995 would have been unimaginable and welcome) but a win?

Thankfully much like the Cuban Missile Crisis before it, all of this was avoided at the conclusion of Super XLI in Miami when the scoreboard read, Colts 29 Bears 17. Our time had come, if only for one night our critics would be silenced, and our Colts were the World Champions. No doubt an exciting time for a Colts fan, but instead of dancing in the streets and pointing fingers towards Nashville and Jacksonville, I sat in my rocking chair like a man 40 years my elder, looked at my wife and said, finally!

Stay Dirty

Bob Knight is Pokemon

By: Derek "Hotel" Hottell

One of the greatest benefits of living on the west coast is that College Gameday is playing as soon as you wake up in the morning. I used to feel like a little kid waking up for Saturday morning cartoons jumping out of bed and bolting to the TV to check out Bugs Bunny and the gang.

But, this joy has recently become less and less appealing because of the addition of Coach Bob Knight to the Gameday lineup. It feels like when they started to play cartoons like Power Rangers and Pokemon instead of the good stuff.

Now, I would never tell him this to his face because if I did he would kill me and eat my children. (If you aren’t sure about his general attitude toward humanity, here is a clip of him doing his golf show: Click Here) But, while he may be a great, legendary coach, he is an awful sports commentator and an even worse color analyst.

A perfect example of this would be him droning endlessly about the value of the shot fake during the Gonzaga vs. Memphis game on Saturday. We aren’t talking about three or four times, either, but more like 20 minutes of the game. Gonzaga is trying to make a furious comeback with their second string in the game, Jay Bilas is doing an admiral job of drumming up excitement and actually giving interesting insight, and Knight keeps talking about the shot fake. 

Someone needs to pull him aside and tell him it isn’t a film session with his team, but instead it is television show, which should have some entertainment value!

But, I’m not sure if that is worse than his detailed analysis while picking games where he speaks like a caveman and not the Geico kind.

“Ugh, me Bob Knight, Kansas,” he grunts. Great pick Coach! Thank God you are there to give us your extensive knowledge of the game.

Not only is he personally awful, but because he is such a bully, he makes everyone else worse. I wish that Digger Phelps, Jay Bilas, and the rest of the gang would just tell him to shut up and stop pandering to him. 

I hope he takes the Georgia job just so I don’t have to listen to him anymore. It is amazing that someone who is so entertaining as a coach can be so awful as a commentator. I liked him better when he was punching students, chocking his players, and throwing chairs, but at least we still can rely on Pat Knight to carry on the family tradition. After all, like father, like son. So, ESPN I implore you. Please give me back the adult version of Saturday morning cartoons!

Santonio Holmes Sold Drugs...... No Way!

By: B. Phillips

From the world of Duh, and who cares Santonio Holmes announced to everyone at the Super Bowl this week that he sold drugs for 1 year as a kid, and felt it was time to share his secret in the hopes of 'changing kids lives.' AWESOME, so what's next, are you going to tell us you've smoked weed before, oh wait you were already arrested for that this year. I wonder how many kids lives you are changing with that charge? I mean seriously why do so many athletes feel that they have to 'share,' with us in the interest of doing us a favor or teaching us a lesson? I'm as interested in Holmes' drug history as I am a book by Jerome Bettis on how to fake an injury and keep your job, not at all. Now if everyone will excuse me I'm going to read this article to my son in the hopes he one day will run for office!

Stay Dirty,

BP

Telemarketers vs "Middle of the Mall" People

By: B. Phillips What is worse telemarketers or "Middle of the Mall," people? I say "Middle of the Mall," people for they can actually seek you out, like a wild lion looking for injured prey to gnaw and chew on. I've found the best defense for these people, much like in the wilderness or the streets of LA, is to travel in packs. Therefore you can avoid eye contact, and you are not sucked into buying those things you have to have like roller shoes, spermicidal lube, mix cd of kids songs, spermicidal lube, or a fitted hat with your initials and rap name stitched on it, and spermicidal lube. Plus you can always hang up on a telemarketer! Until Next Time, Stay Dirty

The 10 Questions I would ask AC Slater!

By: Brandon Phillips!

These are the 10 Question I would like to ask Mario Lopez, formerly AC Slater on Saved by the Bell!

1) Do you think Slater called Jessi Mama because of the lack of a mother figure in his life, and as a result he viewed his close relationship with a female (Jessi) similar to that of a mother/son relationship? And if so isn't that kind of like incest, and given you got to hook up with Elizabeth Berkley did you even care?

2) How many tank-tops, and spandex under shirts did Slater own exactly, and do you still wear stone washed jeans with black dress shoes?

3) Where there ever any topics that Saved by the Bell talked about dealing with but decided to hold off because of their time slot (Saturday Morning TV)? ie Perhpas a 3-way between Zach, Screech and Kelly following a night of heavy drinking? Or one of the main characters developing a drug dependancy other then sleeping spills, such as Zach on Blow, Slater on HGH, or Lisa on weed?

4) Were you surprised that of all people Screech was the first one to do release a sex tape?

5) Were there any other high schools in California at that time, or were Bayside and Valley just locked in every state final, of every sport?

6) Did the SBTB Gang ever arrive at the Max only to find someone else setting at their table in the back, proceed to beat the living shit out of them then proclaim the max to be "Our House!"

7) Did you ever want to do Mrs. Morris (she was hot)

8 ) Do you find that people recognize you less with out your perm, and could you take Mr. Kotter in a fight to the death to see who has the best Perm in TV?

9) Did Zach ever "Cell Whip" anyone with his brick sized cell phone, and do you have any idea what service he used? Did they have the network?

10) Did you ever go watch Showgirls, and during the sex scene in the pool stand up and scream "Yea Mama, I hit that!

Until Next Time

Stay Dirty!

Coaches Poll + BCS = BS!

By Brandon Phillips

I feel in the interest of establishing credibility I must first admit that, yes, I recently stated on PST Radio as well as The Sports Guys that I was growing tired of listening to the BCS criticism and playoff solutions. You would think that puts me in the minority when it comes to most college football fans’ view of the BCS, but actually I am on the same Anti-BCS bus, riding to the same stadium, for the same game. You see, “I am Brandon Phillips, and I am a Playoffaholic!” I despise the BCS as much as the next person, however it has become quite obvious that our cries for a playoff are falling on deaf ears, and the reality of change is nowhere in sight. As a result we, as fans, have been relegated to nothing more than puppies chasing our tails, having the same arguments day in and day out. Think about it for a second, if you had a nickel for every time you heard a “who should be in the BCS title game, who shouldn’t be in the BCS title game,” argument that ended with, “That’s why we need a playoff,” you could be the official sponsor of the BCS is Crap Bowl, time and location TBA. The sad part is the small concentration of people who control the BCS, and feed us this “BCS is good for College Football,” crap, have made us, as fans, so irrational that we spend most of our time arguing with each other over something we all agree upon to begin with (we need a playoff). 

The BCS Boobs tell us that all of our arguments about “Who’s number one?” go to show how much interest in college football the BCS generates. Excuse me, I think my BS alarm is going off, allow me to hit the snooze button! So am I to believe there was less interest in college football prior to the BCS? We must stop wasting our time arguing with each other about who should or shouldn’t be in the BCS title game, and redirect this frustration towards the BCS Boobs and force their hand for a PLAYOFF! Leave behind the old days of BCS rhetoric, challenge all playoff naysayers the way you challenge the fan who says USC would beat Florida, or Texas should be in over Oklahoma. I feel it is reasonable to assume if you made a list of the top three groups who should have the most say in the postseason format of college football, you it would go (in some order) Players, Coaches, and Fans. However, as I listen to each of these groups scream for a change, all I hear is college presidents feel the system is “fine.” Interesting that the one group not included in the aforementioned list of “who should matter,” is the one pulling the strings. Ladies. And gentlemen, welcome to college football purgatory.

Now let me reel my ADHD back get to the basis for this article. One of my criticisms of the BCS (among many) has been the Coaches Poll which comprises 1/3 of the BCS formula, or 33.33333333333333333333333333% for those of you who play the percentages. The Coaches Poll in theory sounds like a reasonable idea. Create a panel of voters comprised of respected coaches, include representation from each Bowl Subdivision conference (AKA Division IA for normal people), and let them weigh in on who are the most deserving teams to play for a national championship. Each week these individuals will provide a ranking of Bowl Subdivision teams in an order they feel most appropriate, taking into consideration wins, losses, strength of schedule, blah, blah. I think most of us are okay, up to this point with the theory of a College Football Coaches Poll: now for the problem. For the Coaches Poll to have any credibility, I contend it must center on the premise that the 61-member panel is comprised of high character people who will vote each week in an ethical and unbiased manner. However, I am of the opinion that the next poll, of any kind, which is conducted ethically and unbiased will be the first of its kind. The voting process in and of itself is designed to encourage bias, which is why you vote and support one team or candidate and oppose another. It is human instinct to want to protect your own agenda. Additionally I contest it is extremely hypocritical to expect me, the fan, to take any poll seriously that hands out ballots to:

George O’ Leary: Subject of NCAA investigation at GA Tech regarding ineligible players, and in 2001 was relieved of his temporary duties as Notre Dame Head Coach following the discovery of “inaccuracies” on his resume.

Hal Mumme: UK fans might remember this guy for his high-octane offense as well as the probation, loss of scholarships, and post-season ban that would prevent the Wildcats from taking part in Bowl Play for three seasons.

Mike Price: Probably most remembered for his brief stint as the head coach of the Alabama Crimson Tide, however he was relieved of his duties before even coaching a game after it was alleged by Sports Illustrated that Price was seen at a strip club then later checking into a room with one of the dancers. (I think it is important to not that I’m not criticizing the act as much as I am the judgment.)

Steve Kragthorpe: Need I say more Louisville fans?

And what happens to the votes for coaches given the pink slip moving forward? Tommy Bowden, Sylvester Croom, Philip Fulmer, Tommy Tubberville, Tyrone Willingham? Of course does the question of who is voting really matter if the coaches do not take the time to vote anyway? 

It seems the consensus amongst college football fans is that the coaches do not pay attention to their commitment of doing the poll, and in fact, do not even fill it out themselves, but rather have various staff members make the picks on their behalf. This what brought to light when prior to a 2007 matchup with the Texas Longhorns Ohio St. coach Jim Tressel claimed to vote the Longhorns number one, and his Buckeyes number two. However it was later discovered he actually voted Ohio St. number one and Texas number two. Many felt Tressel didn’t want to give the Longhorns any added billboard material which is why he was less than honest about his ballot. Tressel defended his original comments on the vote by laying the blame on Ohio. St. Director of Player Development Stan Jefferson, who allegedly “changed the pick” when calling it in. For as you know, Directors of Player Development change their head coaches’ votes without their knowledge pretty regularly. Tressel made his original comments with the comfort of knowing the ballots were not made public, however USA Today let it be known if public comment is made by a coach, and is inaccurate, it is their place to set the record straight. Treessel isn’t the only one doing it, he is just the one who got caught. Now each season the final coaches poll is made public (which I love), but what is the logic in not having these votes public all year? How can you justify the last week of the regular season, and not the rest? Is it simply a matter of sacrificing accountability in the poll in exchange to limit bulletin board material for opposing teams?

The latest incident bringing the Coaches Poll into question revolves around Texas Longhorn head coach Mack Brown. Brown announced last week that he would have voted Texas No. 1 in the last coaches poll, going against an agreement with the BCS, but stated, "I read something that said your vote didn't count if you voted for number one because number one already was taken. I didn't want to hurt our team by voting us number one and it not counting, so I guess I misunderstood.” For starters Brown reiterates a clause in the Coaches Poll which dictates coaches have to vote the winner of the BCS Title game number one in their final vote of the season, regardless if they feel that team is deserving or not. Additionally Mack Brown openly acknowledges he’s not even really clear on what the rules of voting are to begin with. Now do these sound like the traits of a system worth determining a national champion in college football to you?

I think it’s important to note that the coaches aren’t entirely to blame. How can you reasonably assume a man who works 80 hours a week preparing his football team could keep up with 30 or 40 other teams across the nation? Additionally, if my paycheck and job security were in some way tied to the outcome of that poll, you can darn well believe I’ll be casting the most self-serving ballot you’ve ever seen. While the Coaches Poll is by all accounts a joke, it is simply part of the bigger problem, the BCS. And yes I know I’m a hypocrite but “That’s why we need a playoff.” Here’s your friggin nickel!




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